Worldwide Beekeeping

General Discussion => Laugh A Little => Topic started by: Wandering Man on May 04, 2018, 01:48:14 pm

Title: Snake Story
Post by: Wandering Man on May 04, 2018, 01:48:14 pm
The Rattlesnake has lived in the Southern US for many, many years.  They are feared by man for their venomous bite.  People in South Texas have learned that anytime we hear the sound of a rattle, we need to tread carefully, or even retreat.  Danger is near, and danger comes in the form of a rattlesnake.

Rattlesnakes take pride in their ability to frighten away humans with just the shake of their tail.  Once upon a time, back when Americans were just beginning to settle the South and Midwest, there was an especially prideful snake, Sssssam.  Sssssam believed that he should be king of all of the other rattlesnakes, and maybe even all of the territory that he could see.

One day, Sssssam was resting on a rock, when he heard two humans riding by on their horses.  They were talking about rattlesnakes and snakes in general.  Sssssam heard one of them comment; “yep, rattlesnakes are a fearsome being.  But do you know what I would fear even more?”  “What?” asked his friend. 
“A King Cobra!  Why I hear they can spit venom 20 yards in front of them, and if they hit your eyes, your blinded for life.  If they get close enough to bite, you’ll be dead in less than a minute.”
Well, this made Sssssam so mad, he jumped off the rock and began to rattle his tail as loud and fast as he could.  The horses reared and ran off.  The men fell from their mounts and started to run, too.

Sssssam felt much better seeing the men and horses run away like that.  But the doubt was left in his head.  Maybe he wasn’t the king of all snakes.  So Sssssam devised a plan.  He would gather as many of his followers around him as he could and conquer new territories.
Sssssam gathered 500 of his best friends, and they headed north.  It took days and months to go as far North as Sssssam wanted to go.  They slithered across rock, through grass and sand.  They swam wide rivers and shallow brooks.

Finally, Sssssam said “Okay, this is it.  We will stop here and establish our New Kingdom of the Rattlesnake here.”  The weather was turning cold, and Sssssam and his friends needed to find shelter.  That night the wind blew and the temperature dropped.  Every one became more lethargic and sleepy, expecting the sun to come out the next day.

But the sun didn’t show up.  Instead, strange white crystals fell out of the sky, covering the land.  The snakes huddled together, waiting, waiting.
Soon, Sssssam heard a noise outside of their shelter.  It was the sound of a rattle.  Then he heard more rattling.  What could this be? He wondered?  Is it a Northern Rattlesnake?  More and more sounds were happening outside.  More and more rattling.
Sssssam took this as a challenge!  “There is a Northern rattlesnake out there.  But they cannot be mightier than we are.  We shall go out to meet this challenge, and take over the North!” he told his companions.

The other snakes protested, “But it is too cold outside.  How can we defeat an enemy that can fight in this cold?”
“If they can handle the cold, so can we!” bragged Sssssam.

Sssssam rallied his troupes, and all of the rattlesnakes came flooding out of their shelter, onto the snow to face their enemy.

What they found was not an army of Northern rattlesnakes.  What they found were humans.  The people of Olathe Kansas were out going about their daily chores, teeth chattering constantly from the cold weather.

Once Sssssam understood his mistake, he ordered a retreat.  But, it was too late.  It was so cold that Sssssam and all of his fellow snakes froze their rattles off.
Reduced to nothing more than harmless grass snakes, and too afraid to travel back home, the snakes tried to hold out in their shelter until Spring, which doesn’t happen until July in Kansas.  They all perished from the cold and from hunger.

And that is why Bakersdozen doesn’t have to worry about rattlesnakes.

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Title: Re: Snake Story
Post by: Les on May 04, 2018, 05:38:09 pm
Keep them suckers in Texas!  Good gracious that thing is huge! :o
Title: Re: Snake Story
Post by: Wandering Man on May 04, 2018, 06:11:59 pm
Keep them suckers in Texas!  Good gracious that thing is huge! :o

My son and I were camping a couple of years ago in Hamilton County.  His dog alerted us to the snake just at dusk.

It was hard to see, and I think we sent 50 rounds of 12 ga. shotgun shot and .38 caliber snake-shot in it's direction.  I have no idea how many actually hit the snake.  We figured it was dying, so went to town for dinner, to let it either crawl away or die where it lay.

In the bright sunlight of day, the next morning, we found the snake.  Son cut off the rattle to save for later.  We went into the property to hunt dove.  When we returned, we found out the dog ate the rattles.
Title: Re: Snake Story
Post by: Bakersdozen on May 05, 2018, 09:57:24 am
Well that explains everything!
Title: Re: Snake Story
Post by: neillsayers on May 05, 2018, 10:32:09 am
Typical Texas tall tale.  :laugh:  Love it!  :laugh:
Title: Re: Snake Story
Post by: Bakersdozen on May 06, 2018, 08:12:03 am
Typical Texas tall tale.  :laugh:  Love it!  :laugh:
As they say, everything is bigger in Texas!