Collards is green.
My hound's name is Blue
and I'm so lucky
to have a sweet thang like you!
Yer hair is like cornsilk
aflappin' in the breeze,
softer than Blue's
and without all them fleas.
You move like the bass,
which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales
but I luv you anyway.
Yer as satisfyin' as okry
jist afryin' in the pan.
Yer as sweet as snuff
right out of the can.
You have summo'yer teeth,
for which I am proud.
I hold my head high
when we's in a crowd.
Them fellers at work,
they all want to know,
what I did to deserve
such a purdy, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape,
yer there fer yer man
to patch up life's troubles
and fix what you can.
Yer as cute as a Junebug
abuzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like them chiggers
I found in my bed.
Cut from the best cloth,
like a plaid flannel shirt,
you spark up my life more
than a fresh load of dirt.
Yer complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl sidin'.
Despite all the years,
yer age, it keeps ahidin'.
Me 'n you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank.
We go together like a skunk goes with stank.
Some men, they buy chocolate
for Valentine's Day.
They git it at Wal-Mart.
It's a romantic way.
Some men buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever"
they explain, suave and couth.
But for this man, Honey,
them jist won't do
'cause yer too special,
You sweet hang, you!
I got you a gift,
without taste or odor,
more useful than diamonds.
It's a new trollin' motor!
