Author Topic: Trials and Tribulations!!  (Read 2389 times)

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Offline LazyBkpr

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Trials and Tribulations!!
« on: December 11, 2013, 10:29:26 am »
Motivated by Perry's ;  "One of those days?"  post

   As he asked..
   Have you ever done something so stupid it defies explanation?

    They say EVERYONE has to be good at something..   My ONE and only truly God granted skill is in AMUSING my wife, kids, and Family!!

   As stated in the "One of those days post...
   Forgetting to put the SUPERS back on the last 4 hives I inspected...   I inspected them ONE AT A TIME.. so dont ASK me how I managed to forget FOUR of them..   I've learned not to set the supers BEHIND me as I work.. I have learned NOT to go look at the yard with a coffee.. because chances are I waste it when I drop it as I run....  I have learned NOT to even look until the wife hops in the shower or has left for work.... I MAKE DANG SURE the vid camera is packed away.. No one wants to see a fat white guy sprinting through a mass of bees in his underwear!!!  and YES, she WOULD!!!


   New packages are an exciting time!!!  A lot to think about when you put them in their new boxes...  A LOT to think about that night as you lay in bed.. wondering... did I take the cork out of ALL the queen cages? I dont remember..  doesnt matter... I can direct release .... toss, and turn, until the MEAN wife HUFFS at you for tossing and turning....   and ASKS you in the morning WHY ON EARTH you were looking in the hives at THREE AM with a flashlight?

   Drive a few miles to your outyard.. making SURE you have EVERYTHING you need.. fill the smoker with starter, grab extra fuel..  extra boxes, extra frames, extra everything JUST to make sure.... get to the outyard...  realize you forgot the gate key.. drive back and get the key and return to the outyard and  realize the smoker is still sitting on the bench where you filled it...
   GO back, get it, drive back again... no Hive tool..      Use a pocket knife to open the boxes and settle for a less than perfect inspection when you break the pocket knife off between boxes...

   Wear shorts to do a quick inspection?  Inspection all done, bend over to pick the lid up and squish the bee IN your shorts?  SCREEEAAAM like  girl!!  FInd wife on floor still laughing five mins later when you get into house???  Listen as she giggles and imitates your girly scream, and watch as she imitates you jumping 17 feet straight up in the air?

   Put your veil on.. and realize you put the pocket full of wood pellets in it last inspection??   WHY, didnt you leave it ON and ignore the pellets until SHE wasn't watching??   NOOO, you had to take it off.. now shes giggling in little spurts every few minutes.....

   WHY??? Do you inspect with no Veil? YOU KNOW BETTER!!!!    Every time you do it you pay the price.. IF you are WELL prepared.. NOTHING GOES WRONG!!!!   It is only when you dont wear the veil that you drop the frame, or the comb falls out.. you gasp, and bend over to grab it...  about then the 2000 bees that were on that frame/comb FIND your face....  you clear enough bees away to see which direction to RUN...
      and.. yes.. SHE was watching.. you can hear her going EEEEEEEEEEEeeEEEEEEEEEEeeEEEEEEEEEEEE    even as you SPRINT across the yard for the house...
Drinking RUM before noon makes you a PIRATE not an alcoholic!

Offline Perry

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Re: Trials and Tribulations!!
« Reply #1 on: December 11, 2013, 03:30:41 pm »
We need a rolling on the ground laughing smiley!  :lol:
"It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor."      
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Offline riverbee

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Re: Trials and Tribulations!!
« Reply #2 on: December 11, 2013, 04:00:53 pm »
"Wear shorts to do a quick inspection? Inspection all done, bend over to pick the lid up and squish the bee IN your shorts? SCREEEAAAM like girl!! FInd wife on floor still laughing five mins later when you get into house??? Listen as she giggles and imitates your girly scream, and watch as she imitates you jumping 17 feet straight up in the air?"

oh my stars, some way funny stuff there........ :lol:

ps lazy, and my favorite.....
"EEEEEEEEEEEeeEEEEEEEEEEeeEEEEEEEEEEEE"............... :lol:
i keep wild things in a box..........™
if you obey the rules, you miss all the fun.....katherine hepburn
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Offline tecumseh

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Re: Trials and Tribulations!!
« Reply #3 on: December 12, 2013, 06:05:54 am »
a snip...
Have you ever done something so stupid it defies explanation?

tecumseh..
well to be quite truthful I attempt to do something really really stupid each and every day.  almost all of my immediate family has always consider by interest in beekeeping to qualify here.

Offline LazyBkpr

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Re: Trials and Tribulations!!
« Reply #4 on: December 12, 2013, 08:57:00 am »
A friend of the family once said...  

   "There are the stupid things you have done..  and there are the stupid things you have yet to do...."
   "The stupid things you have done are funny now, the stupid things you have yet to do will take a few years before they become funny.."
Drinking RUM before noon makes you a PIRATE not an alcoholic!

Offline Perry

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Re: Trials and Tribulations!!
« Reply #5 on: December 12, 2013, 09:11:51 am »
Now that's the truth right there!!  :lol:  :lol:
"It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor."      
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Gypsi

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Re: Trials and Tribulations!!
« Reply #6 on: December 16, 2013, 10:29:06 pm »
Laughing out loud Lazy!  But I don't have to drive to my bees. I could maybe have more bees if i was willing to drive to them. then I would be the one forgetting...

But inspecting bees in underwear?  Nope... No veil?  Not even tonight for the robber screen... winter coat is thicker than my beesuit.

LOL, thank you for sharing.

(my neighbor across the street is a gentleman in his 70's who insisted he needed a hive and forgets his veil. Or he used to. He never asked me why I took benadryl, he didn't and his throat swelled up. OOOPS... His wife keeps an eye on him now.)