Author Topic: Lost Wife !!!!  (Read 8766 times)

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Offline Garden Hive

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Lost Wife !!!!
« on: September 03, 2014, 08:55:39 pm »
Lost Wife
 
On a rural road, a state trooper pulls over a car and asks the elderly driver, “Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?”
 
“Thank God,” the old man replies. “I thought I’d gone deaf!”

OOOppps did i post that :o

Offline riverbee

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #1 on: September 03, 2014, 10:00:33 pm »
............ :D

it should be the other way around tim:

Lost Husband

On a rural road, a state trooper pulls over a car and asks the elderly driver, “Maam, do you realize your husband fell out of the car several miles back?”
 
“Thank God,” the elderly woman replies. “I thought I’d gone deaf!”

OOOPPS......did i repost that?!............ :D :D :D

i keep wild things in a box..........™
if you obey the rules, you miss all the fun.....katherine hepburn
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Gypsi

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #2 on: September 03, 2014, 10:01:41 pm »
:)

Offline iddee

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #3 on: September 03, 2014, 10:49:22 pm »
GH has it right for my house. When my wife is driving, I'm too scared to speak.
“Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.”
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Offline riverbee

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #4 on: September 03, 2014, 11:11:19 pm »
........... :D

well iddee, this is what i learned to do,  when i am driving and he starts back seat driving from the passenger side, i don't say anything and tend to blur out what he says.....  i just stop the truck, get out and invite him to drive..........  she's all yours.....!!!! :D
sure makes him mad..... :D

i don't speak out much when the mister is driving, his record of running into mcdonald's windows and rear-ending folks speaks for itself.... :D
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Offline Jen

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #5 on: September 03, 2014, 11:16:43 pm »
Riv! That's sooo funny!  :D

   
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Offline LazyBkpr

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #6 on: September 03, 2014, 11:25:28 pm »
My wife only did that once.. I drove off without her...   that was back before cell phones too!
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Offline riverbee

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #7 on: September 03, 2014, 11:42:46 pm »
i don't have a cell phone .... ;D
i keep wild things in a box..........™
if you obey the rules, you miss all the fun.....katherine hepburn
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Offline Garden Hive

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #8 on: September 04, 2014, 05:48:13 am »
i don't have a cell phone .... ;D

Oh yea.... I don't have one of those...... A Wife ! ;) :D


Offline Perry

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #9 on: September 04, 2014, 06:53:16 am »
My wife only did that once.. I drove off without her...   that was back before cell phones too!
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

I've sort of done that with my boy. After getting tired of waiting for him to get ready for school, I drove off and delivered his backpack there and told him to have a nice walk when I got home to find him standing in the driveway.
Tough love sometimes.
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Offline efmesch

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #10 on: September 04, 2014, 09:10:39 am »
Did anyone pay attention to the change from the original to the re-worked presentation?
Garden HIve told about an OLD man,   Riverbee returned a story about an ELDERLY woman. 
I wonder what psychological undertones the changed presentations  bring along with them.

Offline iddee

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #11 on: September 04, 2014, 09:17:54 am »
Good one, Ef.   :occasion14: :laugh:
“Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.”
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Gypsi

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #12 on: September 04, 2014, 02:50:20 pm »
My ex-husband insisted on driving, 0 to 50 as quickly is possible in 35 mph zones, then slam on brakes at red light. I had to close my eyes.

My blood pressure dropped a lot 13 years ago.    I do not mind being a crazy little old lady in a 4000 lb truck, but sane driving gives better mileage.

Offline riverbee

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #13 on: September 05, 2014, 12:26:19 am »
"Did anyone pay attention to the change from the original to the re-worked presentation?
Garden HIve told about an OLD man,   Riverbee returned a story about an ELDERLY woman.
I wonder what psychological undertones the changed presentations  bring along with them."


well ef, old guys are old guys......they never hit the 'elderly' stage, they just git old.....where as we women get to the 'ELDERLY' stage BEFORE getting to be OLD women..... :D  and first we go through the SQUIRT STAGE.....then elderly, then old..... :D :D :D

GH~
"Oh yea.... I don't have one of those...... A Wife ! ;) :D"

my condolences to you garden hive.....hmmm ..........you don't know what your missin' :D :laugh:
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Offline efmesch

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #14 on: September 05, 2014, 04:00:58 am »
RB says.... "we women get to the 'ELDERLY' stage BEFORE getting to be OLD women....."
And here I though that women NEVER EVER get old-----they barely get elderly.  Usually  they just keep fixing things up and stay young.  :laugh:

Offline Garden Hive

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #15 on: September 05, 2014, 07:33:40 am »

Riv:
my condolences to you garden hive.....hmmm ..........you don't know what your missin' :D :laugh:


Thanks for the sympathy... :D
I'm about to remedy that ........... I'm sure that can stir up a few more jokes around here also. Funny thing, her father kept bees also ;D

Offline Slowmodem

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #16 on: September 06, 2014, 01:27:57 pm »
RB says.... "we women get to the 'ELDERLY' stage BEFORE getting to be OLD women....."
And here I though that women NEVER EVER get old-----they barely get elderly.  Usually  they just keep fixing things up and stay young.  :laugh:

Yeah, but I've had an ol' lady for many years and wouldn't live without her!   ;)
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Offline lazy shooter

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Re: Lost Wife !!!!
« Reply #17 on: September 06, 2014, 03:40:06 pm »
Old age is a state of mind.  It is not a number.  My wife is a full time school superintendent is Texas.  I work as a site supervisor on hostile environment drilling projects about 100 days per year.  In addition we keep an 800 acre ranch and two rent properties.  We are 73 and 75 and do not have a retirement date in mind.  We have a lot of miles on our odometers, but we are still looking forward.  We aren't old yet.  You're old when you sit down in your rocker and wait for the end.

About driving, my wife has said to me, "everyone else is slowing down."  I've been hearing that 54 years, and I still have not committed a suicide.  It's a testament to my civil obedience.  :)