Author Topic: How do you keep pushing when you can't want to  (Read 375 times)

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Offline Grandma Bear

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Re: How do you keep pushing when you can't want to
« Reply #20 on: January 13, 2021, 09:48:49 am »
A boyfriend will fix you right up.   :yes:  ;D ;D

I'm not sure about that Iddee...he would be more likely than not to slow me down. The last one did his best to run me to financial ruin and just wanted a free farmhand/housekeeper/babysitter with a checkbook.

One thing I've learned since becoming single 5 years ago is that the majority of fellas (at least the one's I've met) have no interest in being helpful to me...they prefer the reverse where I cater to them and pamper them and treat them like a king and have no interests or duties of my own. I've become my own person and it's going to take one hades of a man to make me want to share my life with them at all. All of that said, I'll be honest enough to say that I've only dated 4 fellas in the past 5 years....so maybe Mr helpful gentleheart will appear one day but I ain't holding my breath. I left my doormat for a man days behind along with my floor length skirts and inability to tell a fella to kick rocks.

I'm just trying to figure out how to keep pushing myself to get things done when the things keep multiplying but my time and energy dwindle.

I totally agree Grandma. I kicked the last boyfriend to the curb in Feb 2011, 10 years ago, and focused on my business, home, took up beekeeping, grandkids, started collecting vehicles (that's a hoot), and yeah, I don't need someone looking for a nurse, waittress and housekeeper with a checkbook.   And at 50 you are really a young thing.  I am 61.

If you are tired, and spread too thin it is time to sort your priorities.

at the end of 2018 I quit doing removals, started stabilizing my hives, killing queens with nasty offspring and requeening, and I reduced my stress load. I also sold a few hives, I figured out that 3 was all my local forage would support, and that I didn't want a remote beeyard to have to drive to.   Then in 2019 I took the mean bees out of my neighbor's house and killed one more queen, replaced her with a good one. It was a free removal, I was pretty sure they came from my apiary, hot ones from a removal, and they were robbing my bees.  Then I retired from taking care of other peoples bee problems. A really nasty fall in October 2018 contributed to that, I dislocated several ribs, pulled my intercostal muscles and darn near broke my collarbone.  You have to limit what you do to what you can physically do and that does change as we get older.   And this is the best time to put on a pot of coffee and start listing what you want, today, and in 5 years

I did removals last season, but will likely only go after hanging swarms this year. I fell off a truck last June and tore up my right hand and shoulder so I have no choice but to rearrange a lot of things to accommodate the loss of strength on my dominant side. We have plenty of land and forage for what we plan without remote bee yards that aren't located on family land. My daughter and I still have plans to expand in a lot of ways, but much of that will have to wait until 2022 because we get a new grandbabee girl in the middle of this season.

LOL....collecting vehicles!! One of my side businesses is flipping cars...which is how I ended up with a really nice mercedes for $700 and still miss my giant diesel dually I drove all spring and summer  :laugh:   Like you I have thrown myself into my own life, kids and grands, businesses, and always working to learn more and more about more and more.

A "boyfriend" I have zero interest in...I don't need to scratch and itch or take on someone else who needs cared for. A true honest to goodness partner who is capable of love and emotional intelligence and honesty I would consider...but like I said, I don't date, rarely go anywhere, and live way out in the sticks so he will have to look hard  ;D

I have all sorts of plans, and goals, and timelines...somedays it's just a matter of pushing myself to keep going in one area or another. Today is going to be a do the things sitting down day because yesterday the daughter and I made our quarterly grocery trip to the amish and I carried too many 50 and 100 lb bags and boxes up the drive into the house and down the stairs for storage. Bakersdozen really gave me a boost by simply reminding me that its ok for me to not get it all done in one chop! I often forget to give myself grace and let myself cut things into smaller chores rather than attacking huge projects all at once.  I did learn that if I go out there and turn the radio on I end up enjoying myself so much more, stressing out about not getting it all done less, and actually end up getting more done in less time.

Offline Gypsi

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Re: How do you keep pushing when you can't want to
« Reply #21 on: January 13, 2021, 11:28:30 am »
That's the way to do it then.   I didn't fall doing a removal. I fell running carrying a large koi in a net on a pole in front of me, and I kept the fish up so I couldn't save myself. But the fish was ok.  Ground was irregular and I shouldn't have been running
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Offline Grandma Bear

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Re: How do you keep pushing when you can't want to
« Reply #22 on: January 13, 2021, 01:15:41 pm »
That's the way to do it then.   I didn't fall doing a removal. I fell running carrying a large koi in a net on a pole in front of me, and I kept the fish up so I couldn't save myself. But the fish was ok.  Ground was irregular and I shouldn't have been running

I didn't fall doing a removal either...I have never fallen doing a removal, even with a veil filled with angry bees while standing 20ft high on an extension ladder. Me trying to unload a crated set of bunkbeds all by my less than 100lb self (admittedly stupid decision) from the bed of 3/4 ton dodge dually caused the damage. I was foolish enough to try to catch the crate as it and I fell. It dislocated my right shoulder, fractured my right elbow, and caused multiple fractures in my hand. Thankfully my daughter was on the phone with my 4 year old grandson when it happened and was only a few miles away. The worst feeling of it all was watching my sweet little grandboys who were living with me for the spring and summer trying to push the crate off of me and crying. It took 2 weeks to get them to sleep in those beds.  :'(

Offline Gypsi

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Re: How do you keep pushing when you can't want to
« Reply #23 on: January 13, 2021, 08:37:21 pm »
That's just so sad.  I learned some time ago to just let things fall unless there is a living thing under it.   Some things you can't stop. I've also built my muscles up some. I weigh 135 lbs now and that helps a little. Need to get my cardio going again.
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Offline Grandma Bear

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Re: How do you keep pushing when you can't want to
« Reply #24 on: January 14, 2021, 09:45:53 am »
That's just so sad.  I learned some time ago to just let things fall unless there is a living thing under it.   Some things you can't stop. I've also built my muscles up some. I weigh 135 lbs now and that helps a little. Need to get my cardio going again.

It was terribly sad. The older grandson there that day is an autistic 8 year old, and it really threw him into a difficult mood for weeks, the 4 year old layed the phone down on the gravel beside me and kept yelling at my daughter to hurry while he was crying and trying to move the crate. I didn't intend to try to catch it, I think it was just reflex because it fell in the direction the boys were standing and I was afraid they would get hurt. Since moving back onto the ranch I'm definitely building more muscle, but trying to gain weight is a nightmare...I'm hoping to get back up to 110 before summer. I'm not allowed to cardio anymore, I can do pretty much whatever I want as long as I keep my heartrate as close to normal as possible. If I let my pulse go too fast I end up passing out and I hate it....involuntary naps are no fair!

I guess I missed the lessons on aging gracefully   :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: