Author Topic: Marriage 101  (Read 4734 times)

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Offline iddee

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Marriage 101
« on: December 10, 2016, 06:52:54 am »
A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, ‘Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank.’
Passenger: ‘Who?’

Cabbie: ‘Frank Feldman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time.’

Passenger: ‘There are always a few clouds over everybody.’

Cabbie: Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy.

Passenger: Sounds like he was really something special.

Cabbie: ‘There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman could do everything right.’

Passenger: ‘Wow, what a guy !

Cabbie: ‘He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman.

Passenger: How did you meet him?

Cabbie: “I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his widow.”
“Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.”
― Shel Silverstein
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Offline Green bee

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Re: Marriage 101
« Reply #1 on: December 10, 2016, 07:29:00 am »
 ;D ;D ;D good one
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Albert Einstein

Offline kebee

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Re: Marriage 101
« Reply #2 on: December 10, 2016, 11:13:05 am »
 Now that sounds about right, I am still laughing.

Ken

Offline Perry

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Re: Marriage 101
« Reply #3 on: December 10, 2016, 12:56:11 pm »
 :yes: :yes: :yes: ;D ;D ;D
"It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor."      
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Offline efmesch

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Re: Marriage 101
« Reply #4 on: December 10, 2016, 01:49:57 pm »
Considering Fred's "superb condition", what could have possibly been the cause of his demise?  :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Offline neillsayers

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Re: Marriage 101
« Reply #5 on: December 10, 2016, 07:52:02 pm »
Good 'un iddee! :laugh:
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Offline Michelle

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Re: Marriage 101
« Reply #6 on: December 11, 2016, 08:07:09 am »
 >:( bahahaha!
“One can no more approach people without love than one can approach bees without care. Such is the quality of bees...”
― Leo Tolstoy